I was 26 years in to my Navy career when I learned that the term "compartmentalize" - often used in aviation, and I'm told used in modern psychology - originated on Navy ships. Maybe I should have paid more attention when the ships I embarked went to General Quarters ("GQ") and I camped out in my assigned berthing* while the folks keeping us afloat ran their Damage Control drills.
(*Note: Assigned berthing is where all aviators are told to hide while this pandemonium ensues. We will only be in the way.)
During GQ the 1MC (ship-wide intercom) is alive and loud. Between blaring alarms there are repeated instructions to "Set: Condition Zebra". I now know that means to close all watertight hatches in order to prevent the spread of fire throughout the ship.
In other words, compartmentalize potential damage.
We learn early in aviation to compartmentalize things that may be bothering us on the ground in order to safely go flying and stay 100% focused. During our pre-flight brief we discuss major human factors and, if we decide we can't leave them on the ground, sometimes we don't even get airborne that day.
I've returned one time from a flight during which I failed to compartmentalize: I had a baby at home, and I'd just learned that an old high school friend of mine had lost her baby a few weeks post-partem. I couldn't shake it, I couldn't concentrate, and my student was flying like a doofus. We cut it short and went home and I was completely candid about the decision.
I've carried this concept in to office work and command leadership, and also in the other direction. Focus at work, then leave work at work and focus at home. (I'm not a fan of telework due to its ability to make this division impossible.) I'm choosy about work calls I answer off duty. I tend to choose friends who don't rely on talking about similar careers.
Now I find myself teaching Leadership & Ethics to new department heads (middle management). There's a session I teach on self-care which is one of my favorites. I realized after I got into it that compartmentalization is for temporary use.
At times, completely necessary.
But for the duration, unsustainable.
We are whole people. Our home life affects our work life and vice versa. If we don't deliberately learn how to coexist in both worlds, we will forever come up short in one or more arena, and lie to ourselves using terms like "work-life balance".
If the ship Set: Condition Zebra and stayed in that condition all the time, no one could pass from one part of the ship to the other. Communication would freeze. Only the cooks would get fed. I don't know what would happen with human waste.
So what does harmonious coexistence of our worlds look like? I'm not an expert -- but I feel the fight for my version of "success" is going ok:
I'm excited about the humans my kids are turning out to be.
I love and seek my spouse.
I'm watching my family thrive.
I have no physical ailments.
I am needed.
I love where I live and worship, and I love the people I do life with.
My job is consistently challenging and rewarding, and it provides enough.
Maybe "my version of success" is the first step to the compartmentalization act:
(1) Define your own success.
Why hand something as precious as your own self-worth over to another human or organization?
(2) Prioritize.
It's hard for me to accept that I'm a human with limits, but when I am forced to face this truth, priorities make my choices clear.
(3) Compartmentalize as needed.
My recent favorite iPhone feature is the "Do not disturb" function. I use it when I'm teaching or coaching, and when I'm working out (my phone sleeps in a different room or else I'd use it then too).
Being in front of a classroom or in a coaching session takes 110% of me, so making sure I don't side-eye a text is, for me, critical to quality of instruction and mentorship.
"Do not disturb" while working out is a recent move that gives my brain 30-60 minutes of free-play while I do something healthy for my body. Sometimes my brain hates it when its only task is to count reps or sing along to Outkast. Because it's uncomfortable, I suspect it is good.
These short spurts are focused and necessary, but they can't go on for more than a couple of hours at a time. I'm a whole person. I have people who need me on an unscheduled basis - and that's part of what makes me whole.
(4) Reassess.
This entry has made me reassess... and I admit that 'closeness with my parents and sisters' is a high priority of mine, yet it's not on my list of personal successes. Time to take another look at that.
What does compartmentalization look like for you?
Is it damage control?
Is it stepping in, stepping out, like the salsa?
... does it exist?
